Bullet For Me
by Anonymous-Music
Summary: No one thought that Hiruma would be so desperate. When the unimaginable does happen, however, how can Hiruma be put back together- again?
1. Effects

Eyeshield 21 is owned by its rightful owners Inagaki and Murata

Inspired by an essay I recently wrote on the causes of suicide, and by the suicidal fanfiction that I have seen/read- if I'm copying, please let me know to delete this piece.

I am just getting into '21 again, so I will leave a lot of people out until I understand them more.

Hiruma could hardly see through his blurry vision. He could see vague shapes and basic colors, white being prominent due to the lighting of the hospital room. He tried to turn his head, but the darned neck brace limited him. After a few minutes, the voices became clearer, and he could easily identify Kurita's soft-toned voice. Mamori started to surface, whispering to the other team members to be quieter. Sena, Hiruma noted, wasn't talking at all, but he could tell that the gopher was there with the sound of his breathing.

"Where… what… why?" Hiruma could barely get the words out in a coherent fashion. 'I had to have been heavily drugged then,' he thought to himself. He closed his eyes and moaned softly, remembering the past few nights. 'It wasn't supposed to happen this way.'

"Hiruma-kun, do you need anything?" Kurita asked, looking as if he would hug Hiruma and cry. Mamori felt sympathetic for the soft man, due to the fact that he had few friends and to see what they all saw- that made them unnerved more than just a little.

"Hiruma-san, why would you do that to yourself?" Sena had been quiet the whole time because he was afraid to cry out loud or make any sudden noises. Hiruma opened his narrow eyes, hardly able to focus on Sena. He thought that it would be no big deal, but he was wrong and that made Hiruma question Sena- or interrogate, depending on how you looked at the situation.

"Why would you like to know? It has nothing to bloody do with you. Besides, if I was such an enemy to the school, why would you guys give a crap?" Hiruma started to sound worse, overusing his vocal cords to be loud and intimidating.

"We care because we are your friends- or am I mistaken, Hiruma Yoichi? That stunt you pulled made sure that you got mental help and were always with a friend and or an acquaintance. Why would you think about that stuff? You have your life in front of you, and you choose to shoot it down- why?" Mamori was practically screaming by the end of her rant, but Hiruma was not impressed.

"My reasons are not a public affair, manager. If I don't tell you, then I don't tell you. You don't know what the flip I've done in my life, and you won't want to. I got here because I made a decision, but that decision you guys rejected for an odd reason. I don't get why you would help me," Hiruma finished, out of breath from the emphasis and the drugs. The room was quiet for a while, the sound of Kurita and Sena's crying and Hiruma's labored breaths being the next two loudest things next to the heart moniter.

"Why didn't you ask for help, then?" Kurita asked softly, broken at his friend's attempted suicide. 'Kurita, if only you could know that those closest to you will feel more of your shared pain than those farther from you,' Hiruma thought bitterly.

"Fatty, I don't ask for help; bad things happen when I do, and that is from experience," Hiruma told him in the smoothest voice that he could produce from his drug-filled throat. "A person can only be broken and rebuilt so many times before they shatter and are forever in a million pieces."

Before anyone could say anything else, Hiruma's eyes rolled back into his head, unconsciousness catching him into its silent arms.

"Things won't be getting better for a while, will they," Mamori said, not really asking for an answer. She, Kurita and Sena were asked to leave the room until tomorrow so that Hiruma could get some sleep, but they knew that Hiruma needed friends to get better- and he needed to get the hurt out before he relapsed and succeeded in killing himself.


	2. Closer

Eyeshield 21 is owned by the men on the cover.

When I hear music, it inspires me- thank you all who contribute to the web music and music videos.

Thank you for reviewing the first chapter- I was very excited to get good news on my first action story. Please enjoy this new chapter. Please, also, let me know of the three "brother's " names- arigato! ^^()

Mamori hardly slept that night. She couldn't stand to think about Hiruma in a bed with no comfort. So, at seven in the morning, she called Sena, Monta, Yukimitsu, Kurita, Musashi, Suzuna and her idiotic brother, Daikichi, and the "brothers". She asked them one out-of-character-for-a-good-reason question:

" May you please skip school for today?" After all, one weekend is never enough for family emergencies. For each member, the reason was too serious to brush off, and by eight o' clock A.M., everyone was at the hospital, begging to see their quarterback.

"You can keep it down, you know- lots of us are already awake."

"Hiruma!" resounded throughout the room, causing their demolition-loving friend to cover his ears. A nurse walked in, checking his monitors, I.V. drip, and his temperature. She nodded her head and left the room when she finished, leaving everyone hopeful that Hiruma would be on his feet again.

"So, will you be able to leave soon?" Yukimitsu asked, hoping for the optimistic answer. The whole team had been astounded by the news received that past Friday morning. Everyone had even made cards and worked extremely hard during the three days to impress Hiruma when he got back.

"Baldy, if they lied about my leaving this morning, then I'm leaving anyway. You don't see me staying here long, do you?" Hiruma smiled the whole time, but Even Taki knew that he was hurting inside. Mamori had had enough of his disguise, trying to act tough even though everyone at Deimon High knew that he had tried to shoot himself with one of his machine guns in the football room.

"Hiruma, will it kill you if you just showed your emotions to your friends? You act as if you can't be touched- and that meeting with Gaou shoves that out the door- and you act like you can't show your feelings to others; you have to be strong for us, in a simple way of understanding," she yelled, making Hiruma peeved for the second day in a row. He rubbed his eyes, ran his right hand through his bleached hair, and sat up even higher than he had when they came in.

"Flipping manager, I will reiterate what I said yesterday- if I don't act or do something, then to bad. I am not a toy or a dog, and as I told you before, bad things happen when I show my feelings," Hiruma recited, able to hold his temper and his voice level. Sena could tell that Hiruma was hiding something, but he thought better than to ask what was up.

"Hiruma, are you feeling better?" Kurita asked, concern bright on his chestnut-shaped face. Hiruma nodded, then he handed him a piece of paper.

Monta grabbed the paper from Kurita, surprising him, and took it over to the "brothers" and Taki. They stared at the napkin, reading each and every detail. Suddenly, the "brothers" started to shout, "What?!", Monta just fainted, and Taki stopped twirling immediately.

"It's a play against the Ojou White Knights!" they yelled, causing Hiruma to cover his ears and throw a glass of water at their heads. Those not in the fire line were cracking up, but Hiruma seethed, glaring fire from below at the guilty group.

"I didn't just sleep and get check ups, idiots. I was allowed to use my laptop to research the Knights so that we can beat them harder into the ground. I also checked out how to run faster for a lot longer- that's for you, midget," Hiruma said. "Don't worry, though- I made some workouts for everyone so that they can improve their abilities. Each one is specially designed for your jobs and body types- for example you brothers do not have the same workout as Fatty, due to your body differences," he elaborated, making sure that everyone understood what he was saying.

"Hiruma Yoichi, you are able to leave as soon as you are able too," said a nurse from the door, smiling a sugar coated smile that Hiruma wanted to shoot off with a shotgun.

"Thank you," Mamori replied for him. She noticed him grab a bag full of clothes.

"Suzuna, let's go out to the hall for a while until he's finished, alright?"

"Okay! Do any of you want a drink or a snack from the vending machines?" she asked, and all she could understand was, "Anything".

After Hiruma was dressed, the group left to find the girls. They found them on the bottom floor, trying to get a snack pack out of the old machine. Mamori and Suzuna looked closely at how Hiruma was dressed.

'Why is he wearing his uniform?' they asked themselves, but Mamori beat Suzuna at scolding him.

"Hiruma, you can't go to school today- you go tomorrow and you get to stay at one of our houses, and the house is a temple; take a guess at who's it is," Mamori said, making Hiruma look at her and nod. Without another word aside from Daikichi and Kurita's agreements, the group of students left the hospital, coming closer to helping Hiruma heal and love.


End file.
